Our Folded Hands

Women helping Women. Reaching out to the Sister who still suffers. Helping each other through the Good times and the Difficult times. To get to the SOBER way of life, One Day at a Time.

Promise of a new Day

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Memories, like olives, are an acquired taste.
— Max Beerbohm—
We’ve all learned to like different things as we’ve grown; different flavors, different colors, different music. There’s no such thing as naturally liking hockey or jazz; even if we’re barely aware of doing so, we had to discipline ourselves to find the pattern of reward in the game or the music.
It’s no accident that the greater the effort we expend on acquiring a new taste, usually the greater the pleasure it gives us. Bridge is more fun than gin rummy; Bach wears better than Montovani. It’s true for other behaviors as well; the more of ourselves we invest, the greater the rewards.
This is nowhere so true as in relationships—the more we put in, the more we receive. A truly high quality of personal relationships is something we all deserve and too few of us get. We may settle for less than we deserve out of doubt or pity or the sneaking feeling that perhaps we don’t deserve the best, after all.
The first and most important element is us—our own investment, the honesty and openness we bring to others, and the trust we are willing to bestow. Quality attracts quality; if we have trouble with our relationships, we’d do well to reevaluate the tastes we’ve acquired.
I’ll look at my part; the only person I’m responsible for is me.