Do not dream of influencing other people…Think of things in themselves. —Virginia Woolf—
One sort of plan is doomed to almost certain failure: the plan we have for someone else. An experienced breeder can predict a pedigreed
puppy’s future with reasonable accuracy, but a human child is quite a different matter. Any relationship that is built on our expectations for another turns into a bitter struggle, a disappointment, or both. There is one person, and only one, on whose life we can have a strong, positive influence, and that is each one of us. What’s more, we deserve our own support. We’ll richly repay our efforts in our own behalf. Anything we can do for our selves will stay with us; the more we learn, the wiser well become.
Things in themselves are the actual things in our lives, now: our work, our play, our relation ships, our spiritual growth. These things deserve our best efforts. As we become more and more the persons we want to be, we will discover the spheres we are meant to inhabit, and learn to welcome those who share them with us. My efforts in my own behalf are never wasted.