“… you never get over bein’ a child long’s you have a mother to go to.” —Sarah Orne Jewett—
For most of us, our mothers were the first love, and the quality of our relationships throughout life is influenced by that earliest one. A mark of real maturity is the ability to see our mothers simply as human beings-lovable,
fallible, interesting, and imperfect, just like ourselves. Some or us have suffered a mother’s early death; some of us cope bravely with her long illness. Few of us have a simple, easy relationship with our mothers. Too much is at stake. The infant who needs its mother’s arms lives on within us all. Few of us have such a continuous bond with our mothers, but we’re fortunate if we can have an adult relationship that includes the love and nurturing we crave, because we never get past the need for it. The most successful intimacy seems to be based on reciprocal nurturing, for we need to give as well as to receive. The child I was lives within me, and so does the mothering caretaker I first loved.